The Echo Chamber Blog

In case you missed it, Ted Green of KTLA T.V. in LA recently wrote an article instructing Lakers fans on how to hate the Celtics.   Basically, he says they’re all bad dudes and thugs on the court.   Teddy, those in  glass houses…………..

Shannon Brown: As a rule you should avoid men with women’s names. Especially ones who, like Shannon, are about one  neck tat from an honorary membership in maximum security.  Besides that, this guy has become one of the more over hyped bench guys ever.  A back up point guard that averages a little over one assist per game is about as useful as a text-book on Huntington Beach.  In addition, this guys performance in this year’s dunk contest was just abysmal.  He had lived on Sports Center all year, but come the contest he looked like the last kid picked in gym glass.  If you can’t handle that pressure what will The Finals do to you.

Lamar Odom: Mr. Kardashian  is one of the most disappointing players of my basketball life time.  He was supposed to be the next great play maker with height and athleticism.  Instead, he is a surly sixth man who needs constant prodding from the people around him to exert any effort.  Lamar almost became the first guy kicked out the league for smoking weed while with the Clippers.  He failed piss tests all the time. His exploits during his one year of college put the University of 401 on probation for a shade under eternity.

Pau Gasol: Llama looks like the kind of guy who’s B.O can clear a train car in 15 seconds.  Hands down the worst beard in professional sports.  Gasol is softer than my Comfortpedic.  He spent the 2008 finals covering his head and running away with a shell-shocked look on his face.  Gasol has supposedly gotten tougher, but I still see a lot of flops on the defensive end and he ends up on a lot of posters.

Derek Fisher: Straight up mugger.   That’s all.

Ron Artest: Where do we start.  The man who almost destroyed the league in one night in Auburn Hills.  Artest has always been bat-shit crazy.  His buzzer beating put-back in the conference finals has suddenly made him a beloved figure on the Lake show, even though he’s been hurting this team all season.  Artest has quit on every team he has played for.  After the Pacers stuck their necks out and supported him after his “Punch every fan in the Face” campaign, he rewarded them by quitting to make a shitty hip-hop album that has sold about six copies.   Of course, he has a few domestics on his docket also.  He fits right in the land of Heidi and Spencer.

Kobe Bryant: We all know Kobe is a bad dude.  We may never know exactly know what happened in Colorado, but something went down.  It was a huge black-eye on the league and it has been erased from every Laker fan’s memory by some experimental medical procedure.   This guy has been known to whip the ball boys so bad that they leave Staples in tears.  He is the petulant super star.  His dad was such an ass that teams were scared to draft him because of his lineage.  He is a great player, but his persona is a blatant Jordan rip off.  If you want to know the real Kobe, talk to people in Philly.  He is truly the man who can never go home.

So there it is.  Guide to hating the Lakers, not that any real Celtics fan needs one.